Thoughts

Divorced with Kids and Dating

 

“Take it slow, & it’ll work itself out fine…All we need is just a little Patience.” -Guns N’ Roses

“Patient”. Yuck! Seriously? After the painstaking ups & downs & brutal back flips of divorce? I get your intense feeling behind NO one stopping those teen “butterflies” you are getting from a fresh, understanding, attractive lover!… Except for those mini beings (this includes your adult children!) that YOU took part in bringing into your world…

• This is not an anti-dating campaign; just a good ole’ Alpha “Please PAUSE” reminder. What effect might dating now have on your children who had no choice in your divorce?
• “Yes, I want you to be happy!” & “Yeah…he/she is nice.” are not FREE tickets to INSTAFAM! They are not the new Mom or Dad. Even if the kids jive, this doesn’t equal automatic sibling. Suggesting they write Mother’s or Father’s Day cards, or your visitation time now always including your new paramour? Probably not. Remember divorce is a death for the whole family & grief healing takes time.
• Your ex’s affair &/or increased mental health &/or substance abuse issues may leave you craving dating stress relief! Understandable. However not fair, your kids may actually need YOU more now! Stay extra attuned to their heightened emotional wants during these changes. I promise your “Patience” will pay off with the right partner for ALL, at the right time…

Get off the marriage go round
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